NATION MOURNS AS VICTORIA'S SECRET TV SHOW CANCELLED

Flags flew at half mast on Tuesday as all across the country, America mourned the loss of what was quickly becoming yet another great American institution -- the Victoria's Secret annual television show. Under pressure from the FCC crackdown on indecency, management at Victoria Secret's decided to pull the show this year, causing instant shockwaves to ripple through the public. Anti-indecency critics wondered aloud whether the 'witch-hunt had gone too far', Presidential candidate John Kerry immediately touted the cancellation of the show as one of the top issues in his new 'Misery Index, while some ordinary Americans even began to question whether God really exits.

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